I suppose that is a much healthier beginning than something as senseless as, "Oh, how long has it been since I have last written?" or, Fates forbid, "Hello, minna-san!" I do, however, stress the truth behind that statement; I have, indeed, pondered long and hard on it, days spent in deep thought, if you will pardon the pun and innuendo. Allow this humble gentleman, then, to share with you my thoughts on the matter.
Evil as I may be, I do have a heart and, in brief moments, its foolishness breaches across the cage I have built around it. In those moments, a fist-shaped organic bloody lump leaps to my throat and seizes the words that should have come forth and forces out utterances that should not have escaped. At the same time, though, I am but a human with innate needs that must be fulfilled at the risk of an inner fire consuming myself. There do be times that I think with my head and, I suppose, I need not mention which one I'm talking about.
These two have been locked in war for a long time, each turning my body against the other that, last week, my brain has had enough and decided that an end to strife and confusion must be reached or otherwise suffer the peril war brings down on everyone's heads. The one above the shoulders.
When a week is spent in headaches and another week in back pains, the brain tends to forgo ethics and stick to cold hard logic. Thus, I present to you two assumptions: love is good and sex is good. They are, of course, as different as apples and oranges so any proverbial shopper with good sense will, of course, examine the merits of each given the circumstances.
The argument goes that sex is rather cheap. In reality, though, sex comes at a very high price but love, on the other hand, has no price. The moment a figure is laid on it, it ceases to be love. It is, therefore, priceless and, quite understandably, rare. Sex, thus, is quite relatively easy to obtain, given the right price, there is enough sex in the world and enough desperate people quite willing to fulfill the role. Love, on the other had, is quite difficult to obtain, or even recognize in the first place.
If one chooses to capitalize on love first, sex will almost always come naturally afterwards. It will be one of those gestures that alone, mean nothing but, in the context of a relationship, serve to strengthen the bond thereafter, very much like hugs and kisses and holding hands. On the other hand, if one opts to enjoy one's youth and go on a f*c<!nG rampage, pardon the pun, then the chance of stumbling upon love is diminishes with every new encounter.
Consider homosexual men who engage in casual sex, trippers, if you will. There are those who absolutely cannot go on a date that does not include physical appraisal. From groping in dark cinemas to groping in restroom stalls to groping in motel rooms, there are certain minimum requirements that must be met, namely arm size, developed, if not defined, chest and abs, equipment size, facial appearance, alignment (any graded value between top and bottom), voice and financial potential. It is quite a rigorous testing each puts the other through and, should a flaw be discerned, the relationship has ended long before it could have begun.
This way, the heart is saved from the disaster of falling head over heels into a relationship that was doomed to fail anyway. However, these encounters serve to fuel an unnatural haste to hook up, a burning addiction to sex or an irrational wrath that leads one to get jaded. (No, I won't be one of those bores who'd lecture you on STD's, you should know that info by now) The heart either closes itself a little more with every encounter or opens wide like a, in local parlance, carinderia open to all who wishes to eat. Given those two initial conditions, any relationship made with that person is much more likely to fade into coldness or erupt into explosive differences.
Also note that, it takes years to establish any decent romantic relationship. On the other hand, for gifted individuals, it could take very well only under five minutes of flirting before the first sexual contact is made. Analogously, a sensible yuppie planning to move out of the house normally gives greater priority to a house, an apartment or a room as compared to, say, a microwave over, an airconditioning unit or a hot tub. If you don't get it you are either a student, a bum or incredibly stupid (it means unbelievably dumb, silly)
It is, therefore, with conviction that I proudly say I have figured out that sex is of lesser importance than love. However, allow me to recommend having at least one sexual encounter before "true" love, just the same. No, I'm not encouraging this for petty reasons like machismo or know-how. It's just that I do not like people making uninformed decisions. Put another way, I'd recommend that the proverbial shopper eat both oranges and apples first, before entering a more lasting agreement with his/her local grocer. Allow me to quote the rather overused cheesiness that is, "Experience is the best teacher."
I sincerely believe that one who had experienced both can make a better decision for himself/herself. I would be honored if you take my word for it but, for your own sake, go forth into the world out there and get some!
A/N: To my boyfriend, I am still here. Yes, I've been flirted with and have flirted in return. I have been tempted and my prudence had been through a gruesome trial. I want you to know what I have chosen. Koko ni iru yo.
Angel, why this cruel to a poor man?
Why do, these flames of hell, you fan?
O, Fortune, who deserves this torture?
How long will you shield the elusive rapture?
